Marriage does not cause problems, it reveals the characters.

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Tortoise character is to withdraw when confronted.

Offense will come but you cannot afford to respond carelessly. John 16:33 I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.”
Be able to take critics and come out positively. Don’t be like a tortoise who withdraw every time they touch his shell. An unhappy turtle will withdraw into its shell, physically and emotionally. He will remain quietly unobtrusive for minutes or even hours. Know that people will disappoint you, trust in God. In Him, there is peace.

Jesus was a humbled and ordinary man, Judas had to kiss Him for His enemies to identify Him.

Matthew 26:48 Now His betrayer had given them a sign, saying, “Whomever I kiss, He is the One; seize Him.” When your life turns around, never change who you are. The blessings must not change you, remain humbled. Philippians 2:6-8 Though he was God, he did not think of equality with God as something to cling to. Instead, he gave up his divine privileges; he took the humble position of a slave and was born as a human being. When he appeared in human form, he humbled himself in obedience to God and died a criminal’s death on a cross.

When there is smoke check where is the fire and extinguish it.

You only see different results when you change the way you do things. Matthew 3:10 The ax is already at the root of the trees, and every tree that does not produce good fruit will be cut down and thrown into the fire. There are situations that you have to rise above. If you don’t change the root, the fruits will be the same. Until you sit down and ask what is it that makes me keep doing the same thing, nothing will change.

The ways of God.

There are people who in our eyes, their character is bad or wrong but you find that God is dealing with them. Some are being humbled and some, is for us to see the works of God with their transformation. Hosea 1:2 When the LORD first began speaking to Israel through Hosea, he said to him, “Go and marry a prostitute, so that some of her children will be conceived in prostitution. This will illustrate how Israel has acted like a prostitute by turning against the LORD and worshiping other gods.”
If it was in our hands, David will not be God’s favorites.

There are people who are prominent and those who are significant.

The heart is hidden deep inside our body and the eye is out for everybody to see yet the heart performs such a critical function in our body. Because of its visibility, you can want to care more to have your eye function better and neglect the heart condition. 1 Corinthians 12:20-24 But now indeed there are many members, yet one body. And the eye cannot say to the hand, “I have no need of you”; nor again the head to the feet, “I have no need of you.” No, much rather, those members of the body which seem to be weaker are necessary. And those members of the body which we think to be less honorable, on these we bestow greater honor; and our unpresentable parts have greater modesty, but our presentable parts have no need. But God composed the body, having given greater honor to that part which lacks it.

There are people who are everywhere and they look important whilst there are those who sit quietly and once you get their profile, you are astonished.

Be a significant person where you are.

See beyond the situation that is before you

When stuck in traffic, God might be dealing with your patience. When you are confronted with a person who offended you, does your response reflect unforgiveness and hatred? What does the scripture say in that situation. Most of the time we offend God with our response more than the person we respond to. When you are a Christian, every situation that confronts you, the Word speak before you. It’s either you obey it or defy it.

Allow the spirit to guide you. It’s not possible to always obey it but always reflect back at your actions and be able to correct situation, the God can trust you with His people. One thing Christians are good at is saying “I have forgiven him/her” or “I’m not angry or hurt”, that is pride speaking through us.

1 Chronicles 28:9 “As for you, my son Solomon, know the God of your father, and serve Him with a loyal heart and with a willing mind; for the LORD searches all hearts and understands all the intent of the thoughts. If you seek Him, He will be found by you; but if you forsake Him, He will cast you off forever.

in my situation, what is God saying?

Your character and behavior is a result of the spirit operating or dominating you.

When Jesus asked his disciples who they think he is, the Spirit dominating within Peter revealed who Jesus was. Matthew 16:15-17 He said to them, “But who do you say that I am?” Simon Peter answered and said, “You are the Christ, the Son of the living God.” Jesus answered and said to him, “Blessed are you, Simon Bar-Jonah, for flesh and blood has not revealed this to you, but My Father who is in heaven.

Later on Jesus was explaining to the disciples that He must go to Jerusalem and suffer in the hands of the priests and scribes, the spirit in Peter rebuked Jesus and Jesus rebuked the spirit in Peter. Matthew 16:23 But He turned and said to Peter, “Get behind Me, Satan! You are an offense to Me, for you are not mindful of the things of God, but the things of men.”

You can be a Christian and be afflicted. Never think you are exempted from affliction. You know if your character is not from God if it is in conflict with the Word. Luke 21:33 Heaven and earth will pass away, but My words will by no means pass away.
God’s Word remains.
If you are a Christian and find yourself angry with any person beyond a day know that the devil entered you because it’s contrary to the Word. Ephesians 4:26 “Be angry, and do not sin”: do not let the sun go down on your wrath.

Galatians 5:19-24 Now the works of the flesh are evident, which are: adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lewdness, idolatry, sorcery, hatred, contentions, jealousies, outbursts of wrath, selfish ambitions, dissensions, heresies, envy, murders, drunkenness, revelries, and the like; of which I tell you beforehand, just as I also told you in time past, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law. And those who are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.